Owning the Story

Who doesn’t love a good story? And who doesn’t look forward to a party, a work dinner or a holiday when you can’t wait to hear that funny storyteller tell some of their most funny and compelling stories? We all know those people right? The thing about stories is this. We all have one. But we aren’t all proud of our stories. And that often starts young, very very young. Sadly, many people believe their stories “are what they are.” It’s “just the way it is and nothings going to change.”  Many people don’t share their story. Not the details. Most common is to tell the surface story. The good stuff. The stuff we want people to see and know.

There are some that come out of that thought process. Those that for some reason realize that their story matters. That they are  even the actual author of their story and not the victim. In this stage they aren’t yet willing, and in many ways, emotionally able, to tell their story. It’s a phase of accepting their story and realizing they may not like parts of it but something inside is pushing them to bring it to the surface, to use their story for some sort of greater good. Shame, fear of judgement, fear of people leaving and plain and simple embarrassment is a part of the struggle. Positively growth is happening. Awareness and understanding are happening. I dare say even pride, pride in the good and bad chapters that make the story, the story of you. Owning the story is such a huge step.

Then theres this next step. It’s a next phase some get to. It’s a small number of people, yet they are so fierce and powerful you want to know them. You don’t always know when and how it happens. You don’t really realize when you get here. There isn’t always a defining moment. But one day you realize, I am rewriting my story.  Me, I am in charge. Not anyone else, just me. Your story becomes so much a part of who you are, so much a part of who you continuously strive to be, that you want your story to be heard. You want to share. You want to impact others so positively that they can be proud of their stories too. The good, the bad and the ugly. Isn’t that what makes a story so good? All the chapters? All the twists and turns? And when you are able to turn your shame, fears, embarrassments into a way of serving others, don’t you at that moment realize my story was all for the greater good? Not just your own greater good, but also for others.

We are all the authors of our stories. Our stories are constantly evolving. Changing. Having plot twists. Having good times and not so good times. And the beauty is this. We all get to guide the outcome by our thoughts, our words, our choices. By the people we surround ourselves with. By the types of relationships we cultivate. By growing into making choices that are right for us and not letting others control our choices. By saying no to things that don’t fill your bucket and by saying yes to things that do. By living in gratitude for all that we do have instead of focusing on what we don’t. By believing in the goodness of others, by learning to trust, learning to forgive and not believing that all people are bad and that all things work against us. And mostly, believing in ourselves.

We all know someone that is “stuck” in their story. Perhaps its even you. Stuck in a way of thinking that has you convinced it will never be different. It will never be better. That you will never have all that you dreamed of having. Constantly comparing to others and what they have that you don’t. And sadly this next statement couldn’t be more true….. believing you will never be pretty enough, skinny enough, smart enough….you name it, the list can go on and on about the stories we write for ourselves with our thoughts and words. There is a world full of adults walking around that believe their stories from their early years define them. These beliefs are often carried on into adulthood and for many, that’s where the story ends.

But what if for just a minute we all decide to believe we are the author of our own stories? That we can change the plot? That we can rewrite the future chapters and learn from the ones before? What if we step out of our comfort zone and decide to change our stories? We can all decide to be an author, an author of our lives. Its not easy. It doesn’t happen over night. It’s not without pain, soul searching or even loss. It takes courage, courage that is hard to have.It takes being brave.  It takes confidence, confidence that may be fully lacking on the inside. And it takes belief. Belief in self even if you are absolutely convinced no-one else believes in you. Here’s the thing about stories. Every good story has twists. Every good story has triumph. Every good story has an ending that has people cheering. Decide to be the best author you can be and get going on the rest of your story!

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Single Mom of 4 kids and 1 crazy puppy. Daughter, Sister, Aunt, Friend. Warrior. Learning . Growing. Manifesting. Empowering like minded women focused on growing and creating the life we want and deserve. We can all start over and find happiness in doing so.

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